Most definitely! The end of 2024 is in sight (yikes!), and you may be planning to host or attend a meal, a getaway, or some other gathering of family and/or friends. This can be the perfect opportunity to share stories and deepen connections while opening the door to advance care planning discussions.
Some questions to consider:
1. Do I talk to others before I launch the conversation?
You don’t want them to feel left out, so consider the likely level of cooperation, their relevant skills and resources, and their proximity. This could be an opportunity for multi-generational interaction and growth.
2. How and when should I have these conversations?
Think about relationship patterns and how conversations usually go. It may be easier for them to read an email or letter, so they have time to process your request. You could have a video chat or record a message if you are more comfortable doing that. And remember- it’s not a “one and done” situation. Think of this as the beginning of a series of talks.
3. What if no one wants to have a discussion?
In the end we can only control our own actions and reactions. Setting your intention that you’re doing this work for your own peace of mind is one of the best ways to feel that you’ve achieved your goal.
Where to start?
Choose 1 item or topic to start with (health care wishes, advance directives, or housing choices, etc.).
Set an intention for your first conversation. It could be deepening your connection, showing respect, enhancing communication, getting real, etc.
Create the context for your conversation. You might have it going through photo albums, or sorting out treasured items, or on a cemetery visit or on a drive. Start with a recollection: “Remember when your dad had to move to assisted living?”
Set aside time and have the conversation! And don’t forget to reflect on how it went afterwards.
One thing I know from experience: it gets easier to have these conversations the more you do it. Are you feeling like you need support? Reach out to any EdgeWalking Collective member: we’re here for you.
—-------
To connect with our collective: http://edge-walking.com / 206.825.9780 / edgewalking.transitions@gmail.com
Comments